Sorry I haven`t written in a while but this past week has been a bit of a rollercoaster for me.  You know that week when you have tests done and you wait for results? Well it was that kind of week.  You go through the tests and then you wait for the doctor to tell you one of three things : 1- There`s nothing more we can do for you so get your affairs in order; 2- This treatment isn`t working anymore so we`ll try something else or ; 3- You`re all clear and cancer free.  My results? 2- the treatment has stopped working so let`s try something else.  Here we go again! The tumor in my liver is a little larger and as far as I know, my bones are stable.  The real issue is that there seems to be fluid in my lungs and around my heart.  A quick fix my doc tells me, but I have to see a cardiologist.  The other bigger issue is that my right eye is acting very wonky lately.  I`m seeing double out of that eye and it annoys the shit out of me.  I can`t drive unless I wear an eye patch!  Son of a bitch!  So now I have to have an MRI to see what the hell is going on there.  Doc says it may mean radiation again.  No biggie! As long as it gets handled I guess.  Whatever!  I`ve decided to think that it`s a small tumor and they`ll zap it away.  SO THERE!! I also need to change the chemo treatment to another concoction (fuck! I hope I don`t lose my hair for the 4th time)!

A weird experience that I forgot to share is when I needed a biopsy of my liver.  After having gone through several rounds of different treatments, my doc thought that maybe the reason my liver tumor wasn’t decreasing was because it was a totally different cancer and was not related to the breast cancer.  He wanted a liver biopsy to help him determine if the tumor was fed by estrogen because we took several steps to eliminated estrogen from my system (3 different kinds of estrogen suppressors, bilateral mastectomy and radiation therapy to fry my ovaries) but the tumor didn’t react to those treatments.  A biopsy is a super simple procedure where they insert a big-ass needle to extract a piece of the tumor.  Sounds easy right?  Here I go to the hospital and a radiology specialist, using an ultrasound to locate the tumor looks at me and BT and says “I`m not touching that” What the hell????  The tumor is located under the lung and he`s afraid to nick my lung!  Maybe Dr. So-and-So can do it using a CT ?  So off we go to see that doctor.  “Can you do the procedure doc? I really need this biopsy.”  Negatory!!  “Could someone in Toronto do it”  He didn`t think so. WTF am I supposed to do now???  The doc thinks there may be another doc that can do it but he`s on holidays.  He calls this doc at home and he gets to the hospital in about 30 minutes.  (My friend and neighbor who is a radiologist also said he wouldn`t do it but this other doc is known for being a bit of a cowboy and getting results).  The doc is very small and is from Newfoundland.  For those of you who are not familiar with this province, let`s just that the residents are incredibly friendly down-to-earth people with a very peculiar accent.  In he walks “Lord Tundering Jesus!! I can do this!” .  By this time BT is shaking in his boots but every nurse in the department told us that this was the guy to get results.  Whew!  He did it without a hitch!  Thanks a million doc!  Turns out the tumor is estrogen fed but for some reason, my body doesn`t seem to react to the medication.

OK enough of that!  Lets get back to being fabulous.  We`ve gone over skin care pretty thoroughly so on to make-up tricks.  My sister and my nieces think I should do a YouTube tutorial but…. I feel that there are so many good ones out there that I don`t feel I`d be helping you. This is a good tutorial for mature women  I`m not a cosmetologist, I just know what works for me. So how about I just write about little tricks I`ve used?  Good! you all agree.

1. After you`ve moisturised as per the page on skin care, I use a good primer like Smashbox before applying my foundation (make sure you buy the right colour foundation because that make a big difference in how your skin looks.  Get a cosmetologist to help you out).  This will help your foundation last longer and prevent it from seeping into your skin and disappearing.
2.   To apply my foundation I use a brush because I feel that a sponge with just absorbs the precious (expensive) foundation.  You can lightly dab a sponge over your face after if you feel that you may have applied to much foundation. I usually use a cream blush and contour colour because I think is blends better on dry skin.
3. To camouflage dark circles I use a colour correct kit like the one made by Maybeline. I apply the colour corrector (yellow in my case because my skin tone is medium) with the little brush then I use my finger to dab it in (the heat from your finger will help it blend more), then I apply the concealer over the same area and again dab it with my finger.  I you want that dewy look, apply the highlighter that is provided on the top of your cheekbone going around your eyes to the top of your eyebrows (kind of in a C shape).
4. If you`re like me, you need to use blush or you look washed out.  As mentioned above, I like to apply a cream blush on my cheekbones but be careful not to go crazy with the colour, a little goes a long way. Blend the blush from the middle of your cheekbone toward your ear.
5. You may want to apply a bit of powder to set your makeup at this point but avoid those with talc because that tends to gather in wrinkles (Not that I have any of those!!).  If you do use powder, use a large brush to apply it but go very lightly.
6. As for your eyes, you can look up several YouTube videos and choose a look that you think will suit you.  The only suggestion I would have here is to stay away from glitter!  Not a good look unless you`re a teenager!  Same goes for very thick eyeliner (my opinion only). I usually stick with a neutral earth tone eyeshadow with a little darker colour on the eye crease and a highlighter under the brows. I also use a charcoal eyeliner very close to the lash line and extend it out a little in an upward motion at the outer corners (like a modified cat eye).  I can now curl my lashes now that they are healthy and I apply a lash primer before my mascara.  If you plan on wearing makeup all day, I would suggest an eyeshadow primer before applying your eyeshadow ( Urban Decay makes a good one)

So what do you think? It seems like a lot of steps but it will become second nature after a while.  Try it out and tell me what you think.

I hope you enjoyed this page even though there are not BT stories.  I`ll keep you up to date on my test results and future treatments in the next few days.  I`ll also share with the little projects that have kept me busy and somewhat sane.  Next week I`m working on a series of paintings for my sister`s Mother in law so I`ll be sharing those along with past projects.